Since I have the week between Christmas and New Years off, I picked up a couple guest bartending shifts at a few bars to recoup from my holiday spendings. And I will say this about the season, it makes the bars unusually crowded on a Tuesday night. But I was doing God’s work, I was helping to push along the holiday suicides. This is how I came to met Carol. Carol’s a waitress at a bar/restaurant I picked up a few shifts because I was friends of friends of the owner and they needed somebody. Quite frankly, I could see why other people can’t stand Carol, as the other bartenders gave me the immediate heads up. Carol would pester me for her drinks while I was taking care of my half of the bar…and she was impatient about it. Of course, this forced my hand into making her customer’s drinks stronger than they should have been, as to cut down on the time between their drink requests, while I was handling my own customers. Eventually we developed a sort of banter, and a sort of playful pushing/shoving of each other. She kept insisting that she didn’t have to take me seriously, as I wasn’t sticking around. And I told her that I didn’t have to worry about pissing her off, for the exact same reason.
Carol and I shared a sparse, awkward dinner together. We made chit chat over Chinese food. I made her a cape codder, and served myself a beer while we ate at the far end of the bar while we waited for last call. It hit me that I didn’t even ask her age until after serving her her drink, but I honestly didn’t even bother to care. I vaguely recalled her talking about applying to grad school…and I was correct as she had just turned twenty one. Most of the dialogue contained joking wise-assness, and talks of her being on my hit list. She talked about wanting to be a nurse, and I pretended to pay close attention. I was distracted. Visions of not quite sugar plums were dancing around in my head. I thought about other girls, and I picked apart her facial jewelry.
I won’t say anything but the truth here (right…), but I’ve been too lazy to post anything here so today I thought that I could take and make up for it at the least partially. With that said it’s time to post a bit more and first out is my extremely literally and very quickly translated (at the most 5 minutes were used) Negima ED (Mahou Sensei Negima!: Mou Hitotsu no Sekai, for more info at AniDB or/and at Anime News Network).
Click here to download the .ass script
The line-up for following days should(!) be Kanji of the day (mornings), glossary of the day (evenings) and a post containing information or anything else (might often be .ass files) should be(!) posted sometime during the day. For knowing the time I’m planning after it’s EST (GMT+1).
Ashlynn Brooke (born August 14, 1985 in Choctaw, Oklahoma) is an American pornographic actress and feature dancer. Prior to becoming an adult film actress in 2006, she worked at a used car dealership near Oklahoma City for over three years. She became an exclusive contract performer with New Sensations / Digital Sin in 2007,and in 2009 she began directing and writing scripts.
2007 Adultcon Top 20 Adult Actresses
2008 F.A.M.E. Award – Favorite Breasts
2009 AVN Award – Best Continuing Video Series Ashlynn Goes to College
2009 AVN Award – Best Interactive DVD My Plaything: Ashlynn Brooke[
2009 AVN Award – Best New Series Ashlynn Goes to College
Alison was and always will be the definition of the two week relationship. We met the day before my Junior year of college and I was all kinds of in lust with her, and then two weeks of 4am phone calls, hour-drives, and some pretty damn good oral sex, we were sick of each other. To be honest, I forget of her existence on an a pretty consistent basis. The only way I think of Alison is when I think about the small relationship I later found out she ruined in hindsight..then Facebook decided we should be friends, and she decided she wanted to grab a beer and chat.
When I got to the bar, I was greeted by an already tipsy Alison. She hugged me, and I’m pretty sure that this was the first time that ever happened. I got a sloppy kiss on the cheek that was essentially on the side of my lip. She bought me two shots, so I could “catch up”, I just joked that I thought thats what we were supposed to be doing…but just in the other kind of sense.
Ali was there with a couple friends who, within ten minutes, had all but vanished. I asked her vague questions, because I didn’t remember a whole lot about her other than her life-gaurding job and the fact that she was blonde and Irish. I didn’t forget the Irishness, but I did forget the freckles. So we did another shot..on her time. I have to say that I don’t entirely hate women trying to liquor me up and buying me free rounds. It’s the 2000s for Christ’s sake…at least for a few more weeks.
So yes, knowing me how well you know me by now dear reader, I got fairly tipsy on a Tuesday. In the middle of the bar, she just loudly asks, “Do you plan on kissing me, or what?” So I obliged the young lady, being the gentlemen I am. And we made out a little in the bar. And I really truly hate making out in public, and I’m pretty sure people were watching. After two minutes max, we cut it out and went back to talking.
Last call hit, and I (read: the bar) decided we should call it quits, and I walked her to the 6, and she let me finish my cigarette. ” I felt the need to ask if she wanted to do it again sometime. A beat. Then a sharp inhale and a, “well…”
Well, I just guess that was that and that that was fairly confusing.
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I love how some things transcend cultral differences and just lie inherent in all people. Like smiling. Or basic emotions. Or that moment you’re at a loud party and the room suddenly goes quiet just as you are screaming something innappropriate.
That so has to be a universal phenomenon…!!
Unless you’re Canadian. Everything flies in the Great North. That’s why people like Celine Dion, Chris Haney and Scott Abbott*, and all the dudes from Nickleback have been allowed to thrive. There is just no sense of right and wrong there. If a moral line exsisted in Canada it wouldn’t just be occassionally crossed. That line would be sodomized and held in a kinky postion until it curled itself into a safe little circle. But I digress…
Those awkward moments in a suddenly silent room….
As with many things in my life, I can’t help but feel I experience a freakishly abnormal amount of cringe-worthy shit. Like there was a mix-up at the People Factory in the Sky (you know, like where we all come from?)…. and there are rotund dwarfs that dole out various situations in little scoops and dollops (resulting in situations known to average folk as – fate, coiencidence, karma, bad luck, good luck – and all of those other wonder terms we use to explain things). But that’s all just science fiction we made up to explain for the fact that those ofish little men in the sky are fucking life up for people.
I’m pretty sure they’ve been dealing with substance abuse problems for centuries. That’s why crappy lives are not evenly distributed across the board like they’re supposed to be. The cracked-out, sky men are screwing the whole system up. I’m calling for a mandatory NA meeting in heaven so they can get their shit together.
Because burnt-out, sky-dwarf junkies are the only explaination I can come up with for the outlandish amount of humiliating experiences I get myself into…
The list is long…
Things like having a piece of basil the size of Kanye West’s ego stuck between your front teeth. And no one tells you. So you go to a job interview with it unknowly bitch-slapping you in the face like the imbecil you are every time you smile.
Unintentionally setting off a fire alarm in the Smithsonian.
Walking in the door after a date, only to realize your zipper has been down for God-knows-how-long. Then noticing (as you’re ripping the bastard dennim from your body) that you are wearing panties so hideous your eccentric aunt wouldn’t even wear them.
Drinking way too much iced tea at a political rally… and then peeing on a sidewalk in front of the mayor. All because your friend told you a dead baby joke that made you laugh so hard you lost bladder control.
I can’t even recount the number of times I’ve stuck not only my foot in my mouth, but my leg- all the way up to my perky vagina. (That bitch seems to stay oblivious to the wretched situations we find ourselves in. I can only attribute this to her passion for screwdrivers and desire to remain in the dark).
For example, a few weeks ago at a family dinner. I was talking to my 87 year old grandmother (who is the definition of traditions and lady-like manners) above the den of thirty family members screaming over each other. As I tried to convince her that this is the PRIME time to hit the dating scence up, the noise volume in the room reached a record-smashing level. She said she was done with men.
So naturally, the exact moment that I screamed, “Grandmother- YOU SHOULD TOTALLY BE A LESBIAN AND HIT IT WITH SOME HOT OLD CHICKS!!!”, was the precise moment of a room-wide lull.
Every single eyeball swiveled towards me.
Then I exploded in a massive cloud of sulfurish smoke.
Not really. But that would have only been fitting had it actually occured. Instead I was resigned to stand there and listen to numerous biblical lectures on homosexuality from my uber-godly cousin.
I have a feeling that all I’m going to get for Christmas is a do-it-yourself surgery kit with all the gear I will need to sew my mouth shut.
* The inventors of Trival Pursuit. The board game 77% responsible for public recognition amoung my family and friends of what an idiot I am.
Next morning there was a change in the appearance of his mother. The sari was replaced by a negligee. Shobha had seen that her body was well covered as she had put on a veil over it. Rahul was pleased to see the change, as whenever his mother came under the sunlight the impression of her voluptuous body was clearly visible.
Shobha had not realized this. She had dressed up in negligee as it freed her movements and was light on her. Rahul’s eyes had a field day ogling over his mother’s features. At one stage Shobha was curious as Rahul did not speak to her and as she suddenly turned to face him, she saw his eyes were glued over her back.
She could feel his stare and this made her heart beat a leap and felt the warmness creeping over her body. She stepped into the kitchen to avoid her son learning about her and when she came back she was recomposed.
Rahul after finishing his breakfast and washing his hands took hold of the material of his mother’s veil and as he wiped his hands with it, the veil slid down from his mother’s body exposing her rich breasts ensconced in the thin material of the negligee to his gaze.
Rahul was embarrassed as his actions disrobed his mother and uttering ’sorry’ he ran out.
Shobha smiled at his discomfort and shaking her head and steadying her dress she went back to her chores.
By the time Rahul returned home from college, his mother had changed over to her usual sari but the sari she had draped on her body had a tantalizing effect on him. It was peach colored one which went very well on her figure. For a few seconds Rahul stood looking at her and his stare again made his mother get excited.
Rahul on reaching his room for wash took his own time to come out. He had locked himself in the bathroom, wondering at his mother’s mode of dressing. He was in two minds. He did not know whether she was tempting him or was acting just casual. As he made up his mind to try to be a little bold and find out for himself, he came down.
After having his supper as he was working out over the math problems, his mother entered. This time her hair was in plaits and this mis-fired all his calculations. He felt sad and dejected. He diverted his attention to his studies and when he felt his mother sit next to him and hug him, he has elated.
Carrying out his math’s assignments as he tried to nudge his elbow over his mother’s thighs it slipped and got lodged between the v of her thighs. He immediately jerked his elbow away as he felt her hot thighs and said ‘oh! Sorry.’
Shobha hugged him closer saying its okay.
This prompted Rahul to face her and on seeing a smiling face, he put his hand on her head and said ‘why is your hair plaited?’
‘Do you want to it to be loose,’ she asked softly? ‘I like your hair to be untied and loose,’ he replied.
‘Do you like to untie them,’ she questioned?
As soon as Shobha saw her son bow his head, she slid across and pushing her back she wedged her body on to his chest and lifting her head up said ‘please’.
Rahul was wonderstruck by this act. Feeing his mother rest her back to his chest and seeing her plaited hair in front his face he felt aroused. He lifted his hands and holding her plaits he slowly untied them and when her hair was set loose, he nuzzled his face into it and inhaled deeply.
‘Do you like its fragrance so much,’ asked his mother.
‘I love it,’ he said pushing his head deeper into her thick curls.
Feeling his face dig deeper into her curls, his mother plastered her back on to his chest and let out a soft moan.
Rahul was excited on seeing his mother squirm and moan softly. Instinctively he put his hands over her shoulders and having a grip on them, he nuzzled his face in her hair and making way he kissed the nape of her neck.
Shobha’s body trembled on feeling him kiss on the nape of her neck and in response she lifted her hands and held his head hard. This emboldened Rahul and taking cue from his mother he slid his hands under her arms and tried to caress her arm pits which were fully covered by her blouse.
This move tickled Shobha and feeling her son trying to caress the hair under her armpits she straightened herself and gently removing his hands from under her armpits said ‘later.’
As soon as she uttered the word ‘later’ she felt shocked as in one way it meant that she was game for it. Thinking it over she felt she had unknowingly accepted her son’s move to caress her armpits. Though it was totally wrong she let go off it there.
Rahul on the other hand was overjoyed to hear her words and he mentally pictured caressing her bare armpits. He felt delighted and impulsively kissed his mother on her cheeks.
All this had aroused his mother and hugging her son she said ‘now go back to your studies.’
This prompted Rahul to be deeply engrossed in his studies and when after an hour or so as he got up, his mother standing in front of him hugged and kissed him goodnight.
Today’s action had gone a shade ahead of what both of them had thought off. Both were pleased with the outcome of it. Shobha for one felt delighted as her closeness made her son work hard in his studies and for Rahul it was like sailing on cloud nine.
The next morning Shobha was up early preparing breakfast and after setting the table she saw him coming down and sit on the dinning table with a book in this hand. Today was the first day of his examination.
Seeing her son absorbed in the book prompted Shobha to sit beside him and feed him. As she was feeding him, which she often used to do, many a times her fingers felt the warm wetness of his mouth which invigorated her.
She kept feeding him and once even pushed her fingers into his mouth. Rahul loved all this and without giving a hint he had opened his mouth wide for her fingers to penetrate his mouth.
As he finished his breakfast he took one spoonfull of food and looking up at his mother he reciprocated her actions. Shobha very gladly accepted it and as she got up from the table she felt his hand brushing her thighs as he wiped his hand on her sari.
Feeling his fingers on her thighs, Shobha to tease her son a little said ‘now don’t pull out my sari.’
On seeing his mother tease him, Rahul was thrilled and in a reflex he jerked her sari a little.
‘You devil’ cried Shobha and smiling at him said ‘enough, now please go.’
Rahul went to the college elevated and wrote his exams with ease.
When he returned home a bit late after meeting his professor to discuss some problems, he saw his mother waiting impatiently for him. This brought much joy to him coming in and he hugged his mother and said ‘I have done well in the exams.’
It was but natural for his mother to kiss him on hearing the news but the kiss which was intended for the cheek slipped a shade down and landed on the edge of Rahul’s lips. Rahul stood shocked on having felt his mother’s lips brush his and before he could come out of it, he saw his mother hurrying to the kitchen.
As his mother strode into the kitchen in a hurry the impressions of her voluptuous buttocks were clearly visible from her sari. Rahul after having captured an eye full of her heavy buttocks juggling in the sari went to his room with a hard on.
Shobha did not come to his room at the usual time but was late. She had to regain some strength before coming in and when she did so, she did not find Rahul at the desk but saw him perched on the sofa.
Rahul was reclining on the sofa as he had completed his math’s papers which required him to sit before the desk but now as he only had to read for the other subjects he was resting on the sofa.
Shobha silently made her way to the sofa and sat down a few spaces away from him. Rahul sensing his mother hesitate, sat still for some time and when he saw her inching towards him, he turned to face her.
Both of them smiled and this brought much relief to them. It was Shobha who started the conversation by asking ‘what exam do you have tomorrow.’
‘Its science Mom’ replied Rahul.
‘How are your preparations going on’ asked his mother?
‘I was waiting for you for the final revision’ replied Rahul.
‘Why me?’ asked his mother smilingly.
‘I need some comfort’ saying this he slid closer to his mother.
‘My poor child’ saying this, Shobha hugged her son and asked ‘are you comfortable now?’
‘I need to feel the softness of your hair’ saying this Rahul started to fondle her hair.
‘You can feel as much as you wish’ uttering these words she let her loose hair to brush his face and turning she settled her back on his chest.
Rahul was enchanted to have his mother reclining on his chest on the sofa. He held a chunk of her hair and inhaled its deep aroma. His mother had used a new fragrance which intoxicated him.
‘You smell lovely, Mom,’ he said as he dug his face deep into her hair.
‘This is for you, my Son,’ she replied grinding her back on his chest.
Rahul by instinct put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her up a little.
Shobha went limp in his arms and slid up as he pulled her.
Rahul on having pulled her up started kissing her on the nape of the neck and moved down to her shoulder blades.
Shobha shivered as she felt his warm wet lips on her naked shoulder blades and uttered some words which were inaudible.
Taking her murmur as a green signal, Rahul put his hands upon her shoulders and on squeezing them he slid them under her arms.
Shobha feeling her son slide his hands under her arms lifted her hands and taking hold of his head she lifted her face and kissed him on the cheeks.
As Shobha lifted her face up, Rahul’s chin which was resting on her shoulder blades slid down and felt the upper part of her swollen breasts for a fraction of a second. This touch excited him and getting bolder he thrust the open palms of his hands down and held her armpits.
This action aroused Shobha and again she lifted her face and kissed his cheeks which in turned lodged Rahul’s chin squarely on the rising mounds of her breasts.
Resting his chin on the warm soft swelling breasts, Rahul started to caress her under the armpits and as his mother did not complain he started to feel the coarse thick hair under her arms. This action of his made his mother moan.
Rahul taking it for granted started pressing his chin down on her breasts while on the same hand he tried to grasp as much of her coarse hair under her armpits as possible.
Feeling his ministrations getting bolder Shobha could not sustain from asking ‘do you like to play with my hair so much?’
This was music to Rahul’s ears and he replied ‘I love to feel and caress them.’
‘Why? What’s so nice about it’ she asked?
‘Its softness and its silkiness,’ replied Rahul.
‘Now are you happy that you felt it,’ she asked?
‘I wish you would wear sleeveless blouse,’ he shot back.
Hearing those words Shobha was mesmerized. She took hold of her son’s face in her hands and bringing closer to hers she planted a wet kiss on his cheeks and said ‘maybe tomorrow.’
On being kissed on his cheeks Rahul by instinct put a finger to his lips indicating that he would want her to kiss his lips. Shobha shied at this gesture and getting up she said ‘now finish off your studies.’
Rahul was more than happy to have had a felt her armpits and also conveyed the message that he would want her to kiss him on his lips. As he went on with his studies, Shobha got up and left him.
Once inside her room she went in search of a sleeveless blouse and found a few old ones. As she tried them on her she felt they were very tight and exposed much of her breasts. She made it a point to get some new ones stitched.
The next morning it was a repeat of the previous day’s proceedings. At the dining table as Shobha was feeding him, she felt him opening his mouth wider when her fingers came up with the food. To cool his passion Shobha intentionally thrust her fingers inside his mouth two or three times. And when Rahul fed her she bit his finger lightly.
When Rahul washed his hands and looked up at his mother, he saw the loose end of her sari was tucked in her waist and his mother had put her hands on her waist daring him to pull out the end of the sari and wipe his hands. Seeing this Rahul acted as if he was baffled and when he had passed his mother and his mother felt sure that he had lost, he suddenly turned and putting his hands from behind he pulled the loose end of her sari and wiped his hands.
The sudden action of her son made her loose control and she fell backwards in his arms. Getting up she said ‘you devil,’ and pushed his son out when she regained her composure.
‘Your own devil’ saying this Rahul went out.
Shobha smiled on hearing him say so and feeling good she went to complete her house hold duties.
That evening Rahul came home late as he had his practical examinations too and as he was very tired he went up to have a wash. Coming down later he saw his mother tucked up in an old cotton sari that had covered her bosom and shoulders completely. He did not get the meaning of it and as he finished his supper he went to his room all the time thinking he still had three papers to compete.
It was after some time that he heard his mother come in. He was puzzled to see her holding a glass of milk in her hand and the way she had tucked her sari so tightly.
Sitting by his side on the sofa Shobha lifted the glass of milk to his mouth and Rahul gulped it down. It was when his mother lifted the loose end of her sari to wipe his mouth that he saw for the first time that she was wearing a sleeveless blouse and this aroused him instantly and he gaped at her.
Looking at him gaping, Shobha asked ‘happy?’ ‘I am delighted’ replied Rahul trying to hug his mother.
‘Wait.’ Said his mother to put down the glass and moving closer and stating ‘you are still a small child’ she again wiped his mouth with her sari.
As his mother came closer Rahul laid his hands over her shoulders and as she was wiping his mouth he moved his head on her forehead.
Shobha continued wiping his mouth and when she was satisfied, she gently placed her lips on his cheeks in such a way that her lips even touched the corner of his lips.
Rahul feeling her lips bracing his, he turned his face slightly till his lips came in full contact with his mothers.
As soon as Shobha felt his lips on hers she hugged her son tightly in her arms and hid her face on his chest in shame.
Rahul realized the dilemma in which his mother was and as he gave her some time to recompose he put his arms over her back and held her tightly in his arms. This was the first time he had held her in this fashion and this gave him a sense of being the man he wanted to be, that is, a fully grown up.
After seeing his mother relaxing Rahul gradually fondled his mother’s back, feeling the fleshy curves on her back. His mother moaned and continued nuzzling herself deep on his chest. This gave him some encouragement and Rahul sliding his hands down on the exposed flesh of his mother’s back and waist, fondled her bare flesh for the first time. This act made his pecker to vibrate inside his pants.
This also invigorated Shobha and tightening her hold upon him she moaned louder. This motivated Rahul to pull his mother up and reclined on the sofa. As he pulled his mother up, he felt his mother’s breasts flattened on his chest and feeling her breasts crush his chest made him erupt his cum in his pants.
Shobha on feeling her breasts were crushed over his chest and on seeing her face close to his, looked up at him and seeing him sweat and understanding its implication she planted a wet kiss on his cheeks and getting up she left the room.
Rahul was flabbergasted on having erupted his cum in the presence of his mother. He had not expected this to happen and this worried him. He was not sure whether his mother had known about it or not. And as he lay on the bed thinking about it, his mother was happy to have made her son cum. Though she knew it was wrong she was content in making her son happy.
She felt there was nothing wrong in hugging and kissing her son and this brought her much relief. (eXbii, 2009)
